Race for First Place
by Suffering Angel
Summary: Vegeta angst. Vegeta found his son's words, and learned how the boy truly feels about him. Now, it's time for him to reasses his father-son relationship. Sequal to Second Best


I don't own Dragon Ball Z. wish I did, then Mirai Trunks would've stayed longer, the Saiyaman would've been a normal super hero (and not… 'have no fear, the great Saiyaman is here!' *shudders*) and Goku'd have the intelligence level of a shoe, and not the shoelace!

A/N: a lot of this is taken from the first in what I'll turn into 'Second Best' trilogy. But for full affect, I recommend you read 'Second Best' first before reading 'Race for First Place'

**Race for first place**

****

Vegeta clenched the note in his fist. The words repeated over and over in his head. It seemed to him he read his son's words thousands of time. He knew them by heart.

_Don't make me hate you._

Hate. Such a strong word. An even stronger emotion. And he had unwittingly allowed his son to fall into it. To feel it. And towards him, his own father.

How did it come to be so? Didn't Trunks know Vegeta loved him dearly? He sacrificed his life for the child, why couldn't Trunks see it?!

_I know. You hate me._

No.

_Can't __Love__Me.___

That's a lie!

_Don't you think I know that?!_

"You shouldn't!"

The note became little more than crumpled paper in Vegeta's fist. His anger raged. But not anger at his son. If anything, his son was the victim here, and thankfully, the Saiyan prince managed to see it through his anger. He was angry at himself.

_You don't know me._

Sadly, that was the truth. Sure, Vegeta knew everything there was to know about the boy. What he liked, disliked, favorite color, least favorite subject at school…

But those were shallow things. On the surface. He knew _about_ Trunks. He didn't know Trunks. The things which made his son tick. And it made his blood boil.

_Do you even know yourself?_

That question frustrated Vegeta. OF COURSE he knew himself! What man wouldn't?! Even Kakarot did!

But what struck Vegeta the most was the innocence behind the question, the bitter reality.

Trunks wasn't asking about Vegeta knowing himself.

He was _saying, _practically throwing it in Vegeta's face: The boy didn't know what made his father tick.

_Train_.

Try again.

_That's all you do._

But not for the reasons Trunks believed. True, beat Goku still ranked high on Vegeta's 'to do' list, but it wasn't the top priority. Sure, beating him would make Vegeta's day. Someday. But he had responsibilities now. Namely, a blue haired mate and a purple haired son. The first needed it more than the last, but until Trunks grew and was able to fend for himself, both still needed Vegeta's protection.

That thought brought Vegeta's train of thoughts to the ruined bridge where it collapsed.

**_HIM._****__**

****

Vegeta sat back on the bed with a sigh. Him. The future version of his son. A version which now, thankfully, will never happen in this timeline. But Vegeta still thought only good of him. A strong, proud warrior. The kind any Saiyan would be proud to call 'son'. But…

_I'm not him._

And…

_I won't be._

So?

_Stop it._

The father knew what happened. How, he didn't. Nor cared. The outcome was what's important. 

Trunks found out about his future self. And thought he could never reach that level.

But I don't want him to! He doesn't need to!

Vegeta thought angrily. Mirai Trunks was strong. But he had no choice. It was either he got strong, and fast, or follow his Gohan. Here, Vegeta filled the rule of the protector, the strong one. And Kakarot helped a bit, of course…

Sure, he wanted Trunks to be strong, but he didn't _have_ to be!

_I'm not perfect. He is. Strong, proud, loyal. Perfect. Like you want me to be___

_Want_ you to be, not force you! Vegeta frowned. Was that his son's idea of his picture of perfect? An almost heartless warrior, who lost everything? 

Perfect.

Like hell.

_But I'm not him._

Thank Dende!

_I can't go on when all else fails_

Vegeta knew that wasn't true. His son kept going after his death. He fought Buu. He went on. And he was proud, oh so proud of his son for that!

_I can't be that strong._

But you can, the father screamed. You ARE.

_If I lose you, can't I cry? Can't I be sad?___

_I cry.___

No shame in that. They weren't on Vegeta-sei. Trunks was a mere boy. He had the right, if not the obligation, to cry. Sure, Vegeta hated it when Trunks cried. But it was because his son was sad! What father loved watching his children cry?!

_Will you cry for me if I die?_

Vegeta thought about it carefully. What would he do? Cry?... the whole concept was beyond him. But he'd mourn his son. He'd cry inwardly. He'd feel lose.

But apparently, his son didn't know it.

_I love you, dad._

Love. Such a strong word. And an even stronger emotion. The son loved his father. But did Trunks really loved Vegeta for who he was? For any other reasons other than their blood relation? Was Vegeta really worthy of his son's love?

_Let me by first place just once_

Looking at the note again, Vegeta felt a sting in his eyes. His son was practically beginning for his approval. But he had it! He had it for so long Vegeta cursed himself for forcing his son to ask. No, not ask.

_Please._

Beg. And it tore Vegeta's heart to shreds.

A/N: :D hope you liked! Wait for the third part ^-^ R&R!


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